My dad’s birthday was Wednesday and we went to the Rockies’ 14-3 loss to Pittsburgh at Coors Field. He said: “Pick something else next year.”
Matt, in Dad’s doghouse
Kiz: The staff here at Kickin’ It Headquarters is here to help with birthday suggestions for your father that he might find more enjoyable than watching the Rockies. How about breakfast, lunch and dinner at the Department of Motor Vehicles? Or maybe find a 2-for-1 deal on a father-and-son bikini wax?
Not hyperbole: There’s no way the Rocks can match Cleveland Spiders’ 20-134 record in 1899. But, looking at teams in the modern era, can they “beat” the Detroit Tigers’ 43-119 record in 2003?
Brandon, Thornton
Kiz: I regularly receive angry emails demanding the Rockies fire manager Bud Black. Would changing the captain of the ship have kept the Titanic afloat after it hit the iceberg?
It can always get worse for the Rockies with franchise owner Dick Monfort at the wheel. He doesn’t care about putting a winning team out there. My love for baseball is absolutely dead. So, too, for many of my friends. We used to have mini-ticket plans at Coors Field and now we don’t go. It’s pathetic.
Ruben, won’t be fooled again
Kiz: The most encouraging statistic of this dismal spring for the Rockies indicates the peeps’ could finally be done playing the fool for Monfort. It might be too early to call it a trend, but attendance at Coors Field through 10 home dates is off more than 15% from last season. Want to change the way the Rockies do business? Cheer for 100 losses on the field and fewer than 2 million fans through the ballpark gates in LoDo.
The Rockies need to learn from Seattle and Tampa Bay how to build an organization to compete with the likes of the Yankees and Dodgers. Hire assistant general managers, scouting directors, and other bright front office personnel from the Mariners or Rays. Let them overhaul the Rockies.
Jim, the answer man
Kiz: What you suggest makes good baseball sense. Which is precisely the reason the Rockies will never, ever do it. And know what’s a bummer? The architect of Seattle’s roster since 2015 is Jerry Dipoto, a former Rockies pitcher whose first front office job was with Colorado.
Here’s a thought, Kiz: The Seattle Kraken will eliminate your precious Avs from the NHL playoffs. Don’t cry.
Rick, handing out hankies
Kiz: Well, here are two thoughts back at you, big guy. No. 1: Seattle has the grit, but probably not the talent, to eliminate the Avs. And No. 2: Yes, there are plenty of sports media types in Denver paid to cheer and cry for the home team. But I ain’t one of them.
And today’s parting shot thanks heaven for small favors.
As one of your greatest critics, I’m puzzled lately. Have you had some kind of divine awakening, Kiz? You’ve been actually writing some positive, uplifting columns on the Denver sports scene. No longer are you mercilessly ripping Monfort or telling Broncos quarterback Russell Wilson he can go straight to H-E- …
D.L., believes in miracles